Today I saw a wiener

Today was the big day for Ivan. His first triathlon in four years. It was about two hours south of where we live. We got lost on the way and almost didn't make it to the registration thingy on time.

So we finally get there, with four minutes to spare, and I have to pee sooooooo bad. The line for the port-o-potties was probably half a mile long since the race was about to start. I decide to go on a little "nature walk" so that I might find a hidden place to relieve myself. Apparently I wasn't the only one who had the same bright idea. I came across several others on the trail. Understanding what that they needed to pee too, I averted my eyes, they (being men) turned away from me so I wouldn't see.... well.... them.

I decided that since I'm a girl, I would have to go a little further or I was going to get caught too, only I couldn't hide myself as easily. So I walk further and further into the woods looking for the perfect spot to pee. I think I found one when something catches my eye up ahead in the trail.

I saw a wiener.

It was some guy who was peeing, only he didn't turn and hide himself from me. He just stood there facing me with it hanging out. He didn't move, hell he wasn't even holding onto it. It was just sort of hanging there.

Now come on people. I was wearing a bright red raincoat. I know he saw me. When I realize this, I get kind of spooked. I am all alone in the woods, far away from all the activity and there is a guy with his weenie hanging out. This is when I run back toward the line for the port-o-potties. Breathing a sigh of relief when Ivan finds me.